Reflections of a Church Member

Less than a year ago, I was given a Calling. It sounds so silly to me to say that and even sillier to write it. It sounds so medieval and lofty. And I can't even boast that a fiery angel or burning bush delivered the message. It was a re-run of the still-popular TV show, “COPS.”

I was sitting at the kitchen table reading a magazine, while my younger son zoned out with the TV. The “COPS” episode featured a prostitution sting, whereby the officers rolled around in a limousine pretending to be a rock band on the way to a show. As they picked up prostitutes, I noticed that the women didn't even bother with conversation or “negotiations” before stripping down.  I was struck with an overwhelming sadness that these women did not know that they were worth so much more than what their bodies could offer.   Not only did they not respect themselves, they did not know that they were worth respecting. And a voice in my head said, “Tell them.”

“Oh, ha-ha, Carrie. That was your own voice,” I said to myself. I told myself that I wouldn't know where to start. That people like that scared me. That I wouldn't know what to say. That I would be putting my family and myself in danger. And the voice said, “Don't you think I would give you the words? Don't you think I would keep you safe? You need to tell my children that they were each made for a unique purpose.” Just a few weeks later, through an adorable YouTube video, I was reminded that Jonah had pretty much the same reservations about being asked to go to Nineveh to tell THEM the same thing.

Not wanting to be swallowed by any big fish (I know we're landlocked, but I knew He could do it anyway), I began my journey. A lot has happened since then, but I have yet to TELL a single prostitute or drug dealer or street person that they are wonderfully and beautifully made by a Father who loves them especially. To be sure, I am working my way to that goal, and I have absolute faith that He wants me to do this, but I have no idea where to go next.

Over the last year, I created a rough outline for a business plan, and I've been moved to tell many people about my vision for what I call Laudari Home (the word laudari roughly means “To be called/to be praised/to be named - this is significant to me). And I have received lots of great feedback and promises for support once Laudari Home opens its doors. But as of now, there are no actual doors or building or even a parking lot to open...yet.

In the last month, something has changed in me. I feel like I'm being called to act, sooner than I expected. I'm not sure how, but I am sure that someone (one of you perhaps) is about to walk into my life to push me in the right direction.

To be honest, I am scared. But I know He is behind everything and that I will be given the words, and the place, and the people.

I also know that we are each wonderfully and beautifully made by a Father who loves us each especially. He has a unique purpose for each of us, and calls us to fulfill that purpose.

Are you listening for your call?